Purim- 'Or Makif Or Pnimi'.
A tora of the holly reb Klonimus Kalman from piasezna – was said in 1942. most of his family was murdered by the naziz, but his brother made it to Israel and was titled the first Zionist rebbi.
“Shoshanat yakov zahala vesamecha birotam yachad techelet mordechay”
After Haman was hung up , mordechai became the second to the king instead of Haman.
So Mordechai wore a blue garment. Why do we learn that mordechai wore a blue garment, is it important if he wore a blue or a green garment? Are we happy about his garment or that Haman was killed and we were saved? But most probably those are the deepest secrets of the world. I want you to open your hearts a million miles, because this tora was said in the Warsaw ghetto , out of the deepest depth . He says there is passage in the psalms, “tfila leani ki ya’atof” – the prayer of the poor surrounds him completely. Imagine I’m praying in my heart please do something for me. It’s a secret between me and g-d. No one will know about it, because it’s inside of me. But imagine I’m a poor broken shleper on the street, I look like haven’t showered in weeks, any one who sees me can guess what I’m praying for. My prayer surrounds me. It’s so strong I cant hold it inside any more. My prayer is so to speak, running outside of me.
We know that there is or pnimi – my inside light and there is or makif surrounding light.
Inside light – it means I have very strong light but I still have vessels I can hold it inside.
Or makif- means I have such strong light I cant keep it inside. I don’t have vessels to keep it inside.
Lets put it this way. Some time I’m broken but I don’t show it o the outside. Some time I’m so broken I cant hold it inside any more. If you ask me how I’m doing ill just start crying and telling you my all story. May be even without you asking. So this passage means that the prayer of the poor is like the surrounding light. (bhinat or hamakif). Can’t hold it inside of me. And he is crying all the time. And the passage continues “lifney hashem yishpoch sicho” , he pours out his heart before g-d. Can you imagine what kind of a heart pouring it is if it just flows out of you? When your pain has reached the level you can’t hold it inside any more? What a level of heart pouring.
If my prayer is on the level that I can still keep it inside then the way I pour it out to g-d is also on an inside level. I pray on a finite level. I have a request please help me. But imagine I’m just on the level that I can’t bare the pain any more. It completely surrounds me and then I pour out my heart. Then I say please please please, I cant , I need your help. Then my prayer is on an infinite level. G-d answers my prayer on the level I ask for it. If I pray on a finite level the answer is also finite. If I ask infinitely the answer is also infinite. Some times g-d helps us on the level that we can contain inside of us the way g-d helped us. And sometimes g-d helps us so much we just are surrounded with light, we can’t contain all the light inside of us. When a person has a flew he prays to get cured and he gets cured. gets cured from a flew, but if a person is nearly dead, and he prays and gets better, he is so full of light , of joy. You know what kind of a miracle happened to me? I nearly died and I’m alive. The lights of heaven are shining on two levels. Sometimes they are shining on the inside light(or pnimi). Sometimes on the or makif level (surrounding level.)
This is the secret of all the creation. To know that g-d is shining his light to the world on two different levels. Sometimes it’s hidden light and sometimes its surrounding all the time.
Sometimes I’m asking g-d for one favor. The way my prayer depends on where my prayer came from. Lets say I asked g-d to help me find 10000 $. so if my prayer was on the level of inside light then g-d helps on inside ligth level,he helps me find someone to give me 10000$. That is a finite prayer. But if I say please g-d I’m so broken , and my prayer is on an infinite level – on or hamakif level (outside light), then suddenly everything goes good in my life. My all life changes. Every one gets well. Everything becomes good.
It happens sometimes. I bless us all it should happen to everybody.
He says Purim is the strangest holiday in the world. Because on purim not only the all nation was saved, could have happened that Haman was killed and the jews get saved and thats it. But it was so much more then that. Eeverybody started to respect mordechai, he became the biggest man in the world. “hahsem keren leamo yarim”, the all world realized we were g-d’s people. and the Persian king gave us permission to go back to Israel and rebuild the holly temple so we went back to rebuild Israel.
Not only G-d helped us but he helped us in a way we didn’t even dream of. So much more then we thought.
So the difference between Purim and Hanukkah is . Hanukkah is on the level that you see the candle , as much as you see that is the light which is shining. Purim is on the level of garments. Because in Jewish mysticism , garments mean it is shining so much it goes even to the outside.. Purim is coming from such a place that it is just infinite. Purim you have to be so high , beyond your mind. Because the light of Purim is shining in complete infinite way. It’s completely infinite light.
Now open your hearts my dearest friends, he says something very beautiful. Sometimes when the help comes from the inside light the question is how good are you inside. Because it’s finite. We measure you. But when the help comes from the or hamakif- from that holly light which surrounds you, then it doesn’t depend who you are or what you are, g-d is just helping you for no reason. The help of Purim comes not because we deserve it, or for any other reason, comes from such a place that nothing can disturb it.
Imagine I want to do someone a favor. And someone comes and says this person doesn’t deserve it. Then it depends on why inside I wanted to help this person. If I wanted to help them because I thought they deserve it and some one tells me they don’t deserve it, then I don’t want to do help them any more.
If I just did it because I want, regardless of how much they deserve it, for no reason, deeper then reasons, maybe because they touched me so deeply, then who cares how much they deserve it.
But then the most beautiful thing he says, the next month 'nisan', it says in Jewish mysticism, “yeshurun orot makifin”. This is the month when g-d’s help completely surrounds you. You know what real freedom means? Freedom is so deep, so beautiful. Freedom is not an inside light. It’s not about being free to do this or that. The holliness of of g-d’s freedom is that it comes from such a deep place. The freedom of nisan comes from such a deep place it completely surrounds us. It’s beyond, it’s completely infinite.
It’s so beautiful, it’s so deep. Some people have an inside light. It’s a very high level, but it is not freedom yet. The freedom of pesach, of nisan is so deep. And we know that purim is a preparation for pesach in the deepest depth.
Some times what ever you live for, what ever you believe in, it’s just an inside light, it’s beautiful and sweet , but it’s finite. But some people, sometime it completely surrounds you. You are so with it , you are living in it. Not only it lives with you , you are living in it.
I pray my all life not just to be an inside Jew. Not to have just a little part in me which is a Jew. I want to be on that level that my Jewishness will surround me. To be completely surrounded with my Jewishness. That where ever I walk around the world every native should know 'here is a Jew'.
What ever we believe in , what ever we do has to be so strong. Has to be on that level.
Also between people. I can love someone on an inside light level. So I have a little light shining inside of me. But some time , between some people, ' I love you so much , it’s absolutely spilling over.
When it comes to peace, the deepest depth is, I want you to know this utmost depth. In the arizal , this is the deepest depth of Jewish mysticism, he says 'bashalom' (peace) is the same letters as 'malbush' (garment), in Hebrew. It means real peace is not the peace which is inside. Real peace completely surrounds you. Has to surround you. The people who have a little peace inside, may be they wont yell at you, but they can still be filled with hatred.
But people who have this 'malbush', this peace, this light surrounds them, when you stand next to them it surrounds you too. The diffrence between me wearing a shirt and someone else wearing it , is very simple. But if I wear this holly garment of light I can dress the all world in it. It doesn’t take away from me. It’s so deep friends…
I don’t know how much I made my self clear, but I raelly want you to take it home with you. It’s so… so deep.
Just remember, there are prayers which are on the level of inner light. Sometimes I pray it hurts me inside, also then g-d helps me. but sometimes it hurts so much it pours over. I’m completely surrounded with the pain of it. Then I pray to g-d so strong, I completely pour out my heart to g-d. Then the help I’m drawing from heaven, is also on the level of completely surrounding me.
In hassidic stories we meet it so often' so strong.
Imagine, moishale was sick and also he was poor and he had no children.
So he comes to the rebbe , he says rebbe i’m so sick, so the rebbe says ok. But when the rebbe prayed for him, he didn’t just get healthy, he also became rich and he had children. Because in heaven when you really open the doors, everything comes down.
So, basically when have a little pain, we have a chance to pray dow everything we need, not just that little thing we feel in need of at that moment. Really to pray for everything.
There is also a very beautiful tora in 'maor vashemesh', he says, my holly master, reb Elimelech, when he walked on the street , he didn’t have to say even one word. But if he passed by, everyones heart was turning over a million times. Because he had this light around him. This 'or hamakif'.
One time I was somewhere and people were discussing what is called a personality. I would say that a personality is that or hamakif. That light which surrounds. Sometimes we say something without really saying it, it comes out through me without my words.
Some people walk into a room, bum. It strikes you.
According to reb Klonimus Kalman of piasezna, your light depends on where your prayer comes from. On what level your pain is, that you are going through in this world. How much you take into your heart everything.
I’ll tell you something very deep, in my own personal way, I felt it very strongly. Lets say there is a war in Israel, some people took it on an inside light level. It hurts them inside. So the way they are ready to help Israel is also on an inside level. So they pray a little bit may be they will send a few dollars. But some people took in on a surrounding light level, so they completely wiped out. So they can’t stop helping and thinking of more ways to help. It means it really touched them infinitely very strongly. Every misery in the world….
Why is it that on shabbes we must wear shabbes garments?
On shabbes not only you celebrate shabbes, you must wear shabbes garments. Because on shabbes it’s not only that I’m resting inside. On shabbes I must be completely surrounded with shabbes. Shabbes is to surround me on the utmost level. So deep. Lets sing a sweet song on a surrounding level 🙂
good shabbes, good yom tov.
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